OK, my Oscar winning dumbass accidents.
I was practicing a trick for the young magician of the year contest. It was a bullet catch. (you can see where this is going can't you?
).
Luckily, it was an air pistol with balistic darts with plastic flights (nice and pointy at both ends).
So, long story short, I fucked up
I swallowed the dart.
I threw myself to the floor to try and cough it up, but the dart went up rather than out, and ended up lodged behing my nasal passage somewhere.
Thr phone was out of order at the time, so my dad had to run to the end of the street to ring for an ambulance.
He came back and tried to calm my mum down, who had taken to running up and down the stairs in panic (she's great in a crisis
).
So my dad tells her i'm ok, so she goes to the phone box and cancels the ambulance.
My dad tells hwr i'm not
that OK, so they ring the ambulance again.
Ambulance finally arrives, and the two dudes manage to get me off the floor and into a chair. I'm dying to sneeze, but I think i'm going to shoot someone if I do
They tell me to lift my tongue up, and as I do it dislodges the dart, and it starts to go down my throat again. I throws myself forwards onto the floor again, and this time I manage to get the dart out.
First thing I said was "and that was your dart"
I did the trick again, but I never won that damn competition